, Muskogee, OK

October 12, 2012

Know your teammate

Homecoming week practice— distraction or not?

Joel: “No.”

Orion: “Yes.”

Orion, we can relate, but we think you missed this one because, well, Joel is in homecoming nirvana. You’ll see what we’re talking about. Let’s move on.

How cheap would you go on a homecoming date?

Joel: “Cheap would be $30, A cheaper dinner and then buy some stuff for her.”

Orion: “$20.”

Orion, you’re close — I mean, Joel could have coupons. But after further review, this is a miss.

Dream homecoming date — any female.

Joel: My girlfriend.”

Orion: “Jessica Alba.”

Memo to girlfriend — he originally said $80 on the homecoming date, then changed his mind. So while we got all warm and fuzzy about his feelings for you, we suggest you make him dig a little deeper. And Orion, you can bring along Jessica and make it a double date.

Ever heard of a mum corsage?

Joel: “No.”

Orion: “No.”

See, this is why on a throwback night where these guys wear Central High jerseys that they should have gone back to those days and invested in what every girl wanted — a mum arrangement on her shoulder with a plethora of ribbons, bells and glitter cascading to the floor. They could cost as much as $100 and well, Joel, that $80 wouldn’t have gotten you very far after a visit to the floral shop.